Why I refuse to hate my body (and how to Show Yourself)
It will take you around 5 minutes to read my 'Stop Hating Your Body Plea', but I Promise you it's worth your time ❤️
I have a complex relationship with my body. Or rather, I USED to have a complicated relation with my body.
And I'm not the only one. In our present Social Media age it's easier to hate your body than to unconditionally love it.
Like many, I have been on every diet out there. My mother told me: 'Stomach in and sit up straight' when I was 2 years old, and from there it was diet after diet. I absolutely hated my body. I tried the 500 calories diet (spinach and steak, no breakfast, no lunch) when I was 13 years old. I can still picture myself at the table, sitting at the dinner table.
Yes, I even prayed: "Dear God, make me skinny."
I clearly remember going through the teenage magazines and seeing nobody who looked like me. Every girl was skinny, pimple-free, blond and they all had mess-free rooms.
But nowadays when I look at pictures of myself, I see a beautiful girl, with gorgeous shining brown skin, long black hair, and the most beautiful face (and yes, I didn't look anything like the Magazine girls)
Now imagine I had grown up in our present time, with Instagram filters, supermodels and the media's constant focus on perfection.
It's a recipe for disaster.
It somehow is easier to hate our bodies than to unconditionally love it. I personally know nobody whose body meets the media conditions. Tall, skinny, dimple-free, wrinkle-free. That's because in real life you can't wear a bloody Instagram filter!
So, at 58 my boobs have dropped (so have my ass and belly) my legs are the very opposite of smooth, I have 'old ladies wrinkling skin' everywhere and I categorically Refuse to Dislike it.
Even though I wish my body looked like I was 28 again (but OMG I was SO unhappy when I was 28 🤨)
Why is Self Love important for entrepreneurs?
Self-love and self-acceptance are crucial for your business success.
You can't expect your clients to like (or love) you when you hate yourself, or even when you simply dislike parts of yourself.
In the Brave Leap we support women entrepreneurs to make money doing what they love by loving all themselves.
Here's what works >>
These are my reasons for LOVING my body (please steal it :-) .
💃🏿1. It's up to me (and you!) to break the vicious cycle of mothers, aunts, grandmothers, friends who are complaining about our bodies. We NEED to show the children and teenagers in our lives what women look like who are fully happy and satisfied with their bodies. We can't just tell them to love their bodies. We need to show them what a woman look like who fully accepts and loves her body!
You and I can break the chain. Just by Showing Up.
💃🏼2. My body is not perfect (duhuh who's body is?) however it's soft and warm, it has taken me all over the world, it helps me to serve my clients, it has given birth, it deserves to be loved and cared for, it can receive and give pleasure, we can use it do slap on the most delicious creams and dress it up in fancy clothes.
💃🏻3. My body and face (and your body and face) are the Most Effective, Most Fabulous AND Cheapest way to connect with our audience.
Yes, you can spend thousands of Euros on your website, your visual identity, and what have you. But this body of yours: your face, your hands, every part of it, is By Far the Easiest way to truly show Who You Really Are to your audience.
WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU ARE YOU HIDING *or being unkind to your own body* ?
1. It's time to immerse yourself in body positivity.
Go to Instagram and follow accounts from #bodypositivity role models. There are many brave women (and a few good men) who lead the way. There are many women of color who are leading the way. They are normalizing black and brown bodies of all sizes (thank you Lizzo), there are disabled women who show up Every Bloody Day to take up space, and to show us that it's NOT only the Kardashians out there. There are women who show us their dimpled bodies - ass, boobs, stretch marks, scars and all - to normalize real bodies.
2. Start a radical self-care routine for yourself
You totally deserve to be taken care of - and it's all up to you. Treat yourself to some lovely lotions and spend time with yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror with soft eyes and replace judgments like: "Ugly" with "Soft". Draw hearts on all the jars and let the love infuse your lotions.
Touch yourself! It's your body. Go on! Even stroking your own hands will make you feel better. It's time for all of us to Love Our Bodies.
3. Forgive yourself
Don't punish yourself. Stop! Just say: "Hey, I did all that, I complained about my body, I have NOT worn all those bright colored clothes because I wanted to blend in, I have been hiding. And it's OKAY! "
I wish you an amazing day
Esther de Charon de Saint Germain
Self-love advocate and business and brand strategist